First, happy belated New Year, by like 22 days…
The great thing I find about blogging is that I have spells of not writing at all and spells where I can’t shut my mouth up but either way, there’s no pressure.
This one really hit me where it hurts because I had to have a good look at myself and admit to myself who I really was. I had a mini break down during this self-awareness stint.
On the other end of this tremulous bridge is a great deal of stability. Self awareness is worth more than gold.
Over the past few weeks, I found myself inserting into conversations:
“blah, blah, blah because I know who I am so blah, blah, blah”.
Ladies and gentlemen, if life has taught me just one thing, it’s that anyone who constantly repeats one thing, generally, is usually living the polar opposite.
Examples you may have heard in life:
- I’m a really kind person,
- I’m so funny (I am though…),
- I can handle my drink.
- Yada, yada, yada…
After finishing a hilarious conversation with my friend Ify, about my recent job search and the art of selling myself, I found myself repeating that dreaded phrase and for once, I heard myself.
I finally heard the lie I was trying to convince myself with.
Do you actually know who you are, you plonker?!
are you trying to convince yourself otherwise?
Turns out, I know quite a bit about my character but not so much about my skill set. Where I thought I excelled, I was, in fact, mediocre and where I believed I had absolutely no skill, I actually excelled.
Turns out my communication skills are not as bad as I thought it was and I’m not as timid as I previously believed.
I’m still an introvert at heart but if my song comes on…
Also turns out, I’m not as patient as I’d like to think I am. In some situations, I can stand around for ages but I realised that this was more down to my indifference to the situation than anything else.
On the other hand, if my grandma asks me to help her search for “how to make kombucha” on her new smartphone, my brain begins to itch!
Why is this important?
Well, it means that I can begin to work hard in areas that I’m not that great in. Instead of thinking that my multitasking skills are close to robot-likeness, I can begin to implement skills that will ACTUALLY improve my skills.
already learning ish in 2018
Being self aware means that you begin at a solid foundation and foundations are pretty difficult to shake. Instead of that multicoloured candy floss cloud I produced from my imagination butt.
Candy floss pretty much dissolves in my sweaty hands.